Wednesday, June 11, 2014
Today is a special day in our family. It is my younger sister Christina’s birthday, for one thing, and we celebrate her birthday with festive thoughts. On the other hand, today is the 10th anniversary of the passing of my father, and we mourn his passing. I remember the day that my dad died. I was incarcerated at a prison camp in Florence, Colorado. I went to call my younger sister to wish her a happy birthday. She sounded very sad on the phone. I asked why she wasn’t celebrating. She told me that our dad had died that day. I know that was a very emotional time for both of my sisters. For me it was different. By that time I’d been incarcerated for nearly 20 years. The decades in prison had numbed me to many feelings that other people experience. Conditioning myself to the hardship of imprisonment did not come without consequences. In order to endure the challenges of spending my 20s, 30s, and 40s in prison, I obsessively focused on preparations I could make to succeed upon release. I was so driven to triumph over the failure factory of imprisonment that I lost many of the emotions that are so natural for others. In August, one full year will have passed since I completed my obligation to the Bureau of Prisons. Yet those strategies that carried me through the journey remain with me. I’m still obsessively driven to succeed, and I am challenged to identify with the emotions that others know so well. Still, I celebrated my younger sister’s birthday, and I said a prayer for my father.
Days since my release from prison: 303
Miles that I ran today: 7.05
Miles that I ran so far this week: 29.25
Miles that I’ve run during the month of June: 81.23
Miles that I ran so far in 2014: 1,215.00
Miles that I need to run in order to reach my annual goal of 2,400 miles: 1,185.00
Miles I’m ahead of schedule to reach my 2,400-mile goal by the end of 2014: 144.09
My weight for today: 165